No more drinking

I've come to the realisation that drinking makes me depressed. We went to Craigs daughters party last night, it was a great night but today I've felt really bad. I cant get the thought of Lee with someone else out of my head. I'm starting to question if I made the right decision. I know deep down inside that I did, but its that although I love Antony dearly, I do miss Lee. Seven years is a long time. Today has been awfull because I have felt shitty and sick all day and I've been in a crap mood. I regretably had a go at Antony over something really silly, which I appologised for, and I was supposed to go to his Dads for a BBQ  and to watch the carnival. In the end I could'nt face it and just dropped him off and came home. I feel really bad about it, and I will say sorry to him when I see him again.

Will this mess ever sort itself out!!